Dating a Friend

There is a girl in my ward who I have liked but never liked enough to go after. In fact, I'm sad to say the one time I did go after her was out of envy, even dis-loyalty (sorry). However, as the months have past by, I've been able to discover her character's hidden gems. And if it's greed that I'm feeling, than so be it. I decided to go for it.

This decision was a tough one for a few reasons. First, she's a good friend. This makes me hold my breath because if it doesn't work out then I may lose a friend or at least part of the friendship. Second, her plans include serving a mission. Yeah, I could stop that from happening if things turn out, but that's if they turn out. Considering these and other details, I had to choose between folding before the hand was dealt and going all in. I chose to give it my best effort, and I hope it works out. Oh, I hope it works out.

Oh the Lessons You Learn

This past week I've been working on project after project, and that has caused me to work long days. But I've learned three things:

1. It's never good to work 10+ hour consecutive days
2. If you want something done right, do it yourself
3. Have a written plan before doing anything

I'm almost done with project 2 of 3 and my mind is already making trivial mistakes. However, this wear and tear does have its benefits. My mind is tired and beat, but just like any other muscle, it rebuilds itself and is stronger than before. I've been craving this strength for a while. When I first got home from my mission (the most exhausting mental event) I was very quick and witty. I'm not sure if it was the mental stress, being among New Yorkers, or a combination that gave me the strength, but it was awesome. After a year or so that quickness started to go away, and I'm finally getting it back.

So mentally I'm stronger, and I can also say that my patience has increased. One group member kept on handing in sub-par material and my roommate and I would look at each other and know that we would have to redo it. Well, as most big projects go, something sprung up last minute and it had to be done. Without saying anything, I stood up and took care of it. Ah, that was easy.

Finally, planning helps sort everything out. We had to write narratives for 20+ diagrams and they were becoming tedious and yet still challenging all at the same time. So I took out a pen and paper and wrote three relevant points to each diagram, sat at my computer, and fired away. Thirty minutes later I had a handful of good drafts. Now, who wants to edit them?

Facing Your Fear...Literally

Tonight I had to face someone I didn't care much to see. I was going to avoid it completely by hanging out at a friend's apartment, and my roommate was ready to talk to the person for me, but I got a phone call from an all too familiar number from the feared "old friend". At that moment, however, my mind went at ease and thoughts of words to say came into my mind. Suddenly the situation didn't make me want to hide, but rather face it and be done with it. I talked to the person and went to my apartment. I waited and about 10 minutes passed before the door knocked. Three people came in carrying the air mattress that was the cause of our meeting, and I smiled and didn't even flinch. I was myself! 100% me! The air mattress will help with me not have any rough nights of sleep, but my mind, my emotions, will finally be at rest. And in the words of my wise father, I "dodged a bullet."